Is it patently obnoxious to point to a story (be it a book, movie or TV show) and say, "Yeah, that's pretty good, but it would be better if you did X,"?
Yes. Probably, almost certainly yes. But is that going to stop me? Absolutely not.
In the series THAT, BUT BETTER (which I'm just starting literally right now), I'm going to indulge that impulse.
And my first victim is ...
SPOILERS AHEAD:
Released in 2011 and currently with a Rotten Tomatoes score of 71 per cent (67 from the audience), The Adjustment Bureau is about a would-be U.S. Senator, David (Matt Damon) who's run for office is kiboshed by a leaked image of his actual ass from a mooning incident many years prior (quaint to think that someone could lose their shot at public office for such a thing. Ah, the good old times).
But his failure is salved by a chance meeting in a men's room with Elise (Emily Blunt) who encourages him to not be a tool and to not give up. This launches him back into gear running for office once more, and it's also where the movie gets all weird, though not in a bad way. Some mysterious guys wearing fedoras (sometimes other hats, too) appear, keeping David on a plan made by a not even a little bit mysterious entity referred to as the Chairman. (Fedora guys are angels, Chairman is God, simple enough). But, of course, David can't have Elise (HAVE is definitely the right verb according to this movie) and his bright future - it's either be with her OR become the President of the United States one day. Similarly, Elise's promising dance career is caput if she's with David, at least according to some of these "angels" (they're more like case workers, says Anthony Mackie).
OK, fair enough, but HERE'S MY GRIPE:
If you remember (and you very well might not as the only reason I'm writing about this nine-year-old-movie is that my partner and I watched it on Netflix last night), the back third of the movie has David racing through the streets of New York, opening doors that lead to impossible places elsewhere in the city (one of the angels' powers that he's borrowed by donning one of their oh so stylish fedoras) on his way to stop Elise from getting married in an impersonal ceremony in front of a judge.
You can just tell that whoever came up with this as salivating the entire movie about this chase scene, with crusty, frustrated fedora angels chasing David all over town. OK, fine, it's a fun, cinematic section of the movie.
But then David confronts Elise in a women's bathroom, which is a cute callback to their original meeting, but it's ANYTHING BUT CUTE. David is breathing heavy and spouting gibberish after not seeing Elise for years, having left her with a sprained angle in a hospital without so much as a word. Then he freaking decks a guy, knocking him out cold, while still trying to tell this lady he's in love with her and he's sorry, etc, etc. THIS IS AN INSANE THING TO HAVE HAPPEN! Would you fall back into the arms of David if confronted in this way (oh, and he's barricading the door to the bathroom, too)? To make this all work, the movie shoves Elise through a door which leads out into Yankee Stadium to show her that magic is happening, and otherwise turn her into a rag doll, blindly pulled along by David, who, let's face it, is acting like a mad man.
This is such a shame because Elise is a wonderful character in every other scene of the film: she's full of energy and spunk and she's impulsive and clearly vibes with David in a cool way. But that's all thrown out because, I guess, the writers, etc. couldn't come up with a way for this all to happen without robbing Elise of rational thought and agency.
But perhaps the story was impossible to tell any other way. NOT A CHANCE.
Here is my THAT, BUT BETTER suggestion:
The whole movie has carefully made sure that David can't find Elise when the Adjustment Bureau steps in. He doesn't have her phone number, he doesn't know her last name, etc. Do you know there are x-million Elise's listed in Google!?!? etc. Well this just isn't so for Elise. She knows David's last name (Norris, by the way). He's basically famous. She could reach out to him in any number of ways, but for some reason never does.
So here's the idea: how about, instead of David running through the streets of New York to stop her wedding, she takes a taxi to his freaking apartment, or to some speaking engagement he's about to ditch, and confronts him right before he starts his magical run, and right before her own wedding? The movie makes it clear she's got misgivings about getting married. And she's not one to just let things slide. She's aggressive and vivacious and the Elise from the first two thirds of the movie would absolutely do this.
This way she has agency, she continues to act in a way that's consistent with the rest of the movie, and the weird "men must ask women out" standard that seems to be a law in this film is finally broken. And then the rest of the movie can continue on as it did. Except they both run through New York, David explains the craziness that is going on but he looks less crazy because he hasn't locked her in a bathroom, he can still give her the choice of never seeing him again or walking through to the angels' private office building in the hopes of confronting God, and maybe she even dons the hat and gets him through a door portal or two just to remind us that women can pull men through a chase scene, too.
I'm convinced that this change would make this movie unequivocally better, and would not have strayed too far from what the movie already is, which is a decent flick that's romantic at times, but also for some reason entrenches some shitty gender stereotypes. Case in point, all the angels are men, AND I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE THIS UNTIL MY PARTNER TOLD ME! That's messed up.
So yeah ... that's THAT, BUT BETTER. Check back soon for the next post, where I think I'll take on a scene in Captain America: Civil War.
Let me know what you think! Maybe watch The Adjustment Bureau (on Netflix now), and see if you have your own adjustments to make. (I just realized how appropriate it is that my first adjustment is for The Adjustment Bureau ... wow).
Adam Kveton
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